


suddenly i see you

by HouseofCyphers



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Fluff and Angst, Friends to Lovers, Idiots in Love, Lowercase, M/M, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 17:13:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,949
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26941192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HouseofCyphers/pseuds/HouseofCyphers
Summary: jisung believed that the soulmate system was complete and utter bullshit.alternative titled: 5 times park jisung tried to find his soulmate and the 1 time he accidentally did so.
Relationships: Huang Ren Jun/Lee Jeno/Na Jaemin, Lee Donghyuck | Haechan/Mark Lee, Lee Taeyong/Suh Youngho | Johnny, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Park Jisung/Zhong Chen Le
Comments: 10
Kudos: 414





	suddenly i see you

**Author's Note:**

> this is my first fully written out nct fic pls be nice
> 
> title from venus - sleeping at last
> 
> ❗️edit (10/11/20): i uploaded this last night while i was tired and forgot to tag markhyuck and norenmin in the tags so now they're there !

park jisung believed that the entire soulmate system is complete and utter bullshit.

it’s not that he hated it, per say, it’s just that he couldn’t have cared less about it.

there were many possible reasons for this. maybe because the system itself was complicated and “really fucking weird,” nothing at all like the young adult romance novels described it to be. maybe because jisung was one of the only people in his friend group without a soulmate and it made him feel alone. granted, he was still young, but so were his friends. he didn’t know if the system was just odd like that or if fate just had it out for him specifically.

or maybe it’s because he couldn’t really choose who his soulmate was.

he never liked the fact that he couldn’t choose who he would end up spending the rest of his life with, ever since he was a kid. he remembered that he cried so hard when his mother explained the entire soulmate system to him.

{ _“b-but what if the person doesn’t like me? what if i don’t like them? what if- if they’re_ mean _?”_

_he remembers his mother's gentle and reassuring smile as she pulled him in for a hug. she stroked his hair and whispered sweet comforts into his ear._

_“your father and i met because of our soul bond, and we clicked instantly. and so did my parents, and your father’s parents, and their parents also. soulmates are made to be together, through thick and thin._

_“your soulmate is going to love you so much, jisung. and not just because they’re your soulmate, but because you’re the most lovable boy in the universe,” his mother wiped away his tears and kissed his cheeks, making him giggle and feel instantly better._ }

thinking back on it, what she probably meant was “you’re destined to fall for your soulmate no matter what, so good luck having to deal with that.”

even though it cheered him up back then, the worries came back as he got older and when the rest of his friends got their soulmates, because even though he claimed to “not give a shit about the system,” it was actually the roots of his many worries. when most of his friends found their other half (or in jaemin’s case, other thirds) in high school, he still didn’t have a soul bond. no way to communicate with his soulmate nor any way to get to them. 

usually, most people who had soulmates were born with a soul bond or developed one in early childhood. jisung never got one, or at least it hadn’t made itself present yet.

and now here he was, a college freshman, in the middle of the library, head full of college math formulas and soulmate related thoughts.

“soulmates 101, soulmates for dummies, fucking uhhh…” chenle was mumbling to himself as he looked through the library aisles, trying to find what he was looking for. “ _aha!_ soulmates: how to find them!” chenle whisper-shouted to himself as he grabbed the book and slammed it onto the table, scaring jisung and snapping him out of whatever thought provoked trance he was in. 

“this was the exact book i had when i was a kid. i know it like the back of my hand,” for emphasis, chenle held up his hand and moved his fingers in front of his friend’s face. jisung glared at the book and then proceeded to glare at the boy in front of him. “chenle, this textbook from your parent’s basement isn’t going to help me. nothing’s helped me for the past 18 years.”

“that’s because you’ve never tried!” chenle made his way to the seat next to jisung. he could feel his heartbeat speeding up from the close proximity, even though chenle has always been this close to him. he didn’t pay much mind to it though.

chenle’s face suddenly turned more serious as he stared into jisung’s eyes. “jisung, you’ve been so worried about your soulmate for years now. i’m not going to just sit here and watch you get even more sad about it than you obviously already are.” and… well, jisung couldn’t argue with that. he let out a deep sigh, letting his friend know that he has surrendered to his plans.

“good! we’re going to try to find your lucky person and figure out which soul bond you have, even if it kills us!” chenle flashed his friend a smile, and if that made jisung’s heart flutter just a tiny bit, he didn’t notice.

  
  


-

  
  


1 - **sight**

  
  


here’s how the soulmate system works:

{ “ ... _the majority of the human population is born with a soul bond that binds them with the person they are most compatible with in this reality. whether the soulmates have met until they’re aware of their bond or not, the bond usually does not make itself observable to the human eye until a person’s childhood, or in some cases, early to late teens.._

_there are many different forms of the soul bond, some much more common than others. the most common ones include:_

**_sight_ ** _\- the two soulmates see in only black and white until they either meet their soulmate for the first time or when the two both realize their feelings for each other._

**_thought_ ** _\- the two soulmates can hear each other’s thoughts if they concentrate hard enough. on rare occasions, a person can hear their soulmate’s thoughts at random times and cannot control what they hear._

**_touch_ ** _\- the two soulmates can communicate through the contact of ink on skin; whatever a person writes on their skin, their soulmate gets the exact markings on the exact same place._

**_feel_ ** _\- the two soulmates can share feelings of intense emotion. when a person becomes overwhelmed with a certain emotion, their soulmate feels the exact same way._

**_speak_ ** _\- the two soulmate’s first sentences spoken to them appear on their skin as soon as they’re said._

_these are only the most common soul bonds. approximately 95% of the human population experiences these soul bonds. there are a plethora of others that are far less common and some that might not even be recorded yet_ … “ (Hwang, Moon, et al. _Soulmates: How to Find Them_. National Soul Bond Association of Seoul, 1991.) }

chenle insisted that they start from the top of the list, even though it would prove to be the trickiest one to figure out.

because park jisung wasn’t colorblind. he saw the world in vibrant color and not in shades of grey.

chenle read more about the sight soul bond in the book, stopping every once in a while to stare at jisung’s eyes with an intensity that could probably scare others. 

“are you sure you’re not color blind?”

“i… what?”

“jisung-ah, what color’s my hair?”

“chenle, this is-”

before jisung could finish his sentence, chenle quickly snapped his fingers right in front of him, startling him in his seat.

“no time for questioning, child, what color’s my hair?”

“brown? look, chenle, you know i’m not colorblind. we should’ve ruled this one out as soon as we first saw it.” 

unfortunately, one does not reason with zhong chenle easily. 

“well, what if i see my hair as brown but _you_ see it as what _i_ see as pink, but _you_ see it as brown because that's what you were taught?”

“... chenle, can we please skip this?”

chenle groaned and set the book on the desk counter. “what if it’s only your soulmate that’s colorblind?” jisung shrugged and hummed an “i dunno” as chenle kept his eyes on the book he just put down. after staring at the book for what felt like forever (but was actually like 2 minutes,) chenle’s head shot up and moved in front of jisung’s without any warning, staring straight into his eyes like he had moments before, but this time more serious, like he was looking for something beyond his friend’s mocha eyes.

jisung should really be used to chenle getting into his personal space more often since he’s been doing just that for nearly 13 years now. but something about him being this close to him seemed _different_ somehow. he took in the boys features bit by bit; his sparkling eyes that burned with intensity, his cheeks that had once been soft and squishy and now could not be any sharper, his lips… jisung found himself wondering about those the most. his lips, his blinding smile, his cute little pout he sometimes does. he couldn’t tell at that moment, but with every little detail jisung remembered, his face only got more flushed.

chenle was the one who broke the silence.

“yeah ok, your eyes look fine. they don’t look like they do any weird shit,” he mumbles as he backed away from a _very_ red jisung.

at this point, every thought jisung just had came rushing back to him like a memory he’d just remembered from long ago. out of all the times chenle had gotten that close to him, he had never thought any of those things, and he especially never got that flustered around him like that. his heart was still hammering in his chest, his hands felt sweaty and gross, and his brain had turned into mush. 

jisung had read enough trashy teen romance novels to know exactly what the fuck was going on. 

“ _helloooo_ ~? earth to big head?” jisung didn’t know how long chenle had been waving a hand across his face for, but that’s what he came back to after zoning out and having a possible realization that tilted his world’s axis by a fuck ton.

“oh! uh.. yeah?”

“i just crossed the sight soul bound off the list. i have an essay due tonight so we’ll pick this back up in a few days?”

jisung blinked owlishly at the older, staying quiet for longer than what’s considered normal. “oh uhh, yeah, sure.”

chenle gave him one of his flashy smiles and jisung knew he was utterly fucked. 

  
  


2 - **thought**

  
  


jisung just pretended that the sudden realization of feelings didn’t affect him in the slightest. he buries those deep down within his subconscious to where they’ll never bubble back up to the surface.

or to quote from a comedian on netflix his brother, taeyong, introduced him to, he’ll keep his emotions right there, and one day, he’ll die.

because 1. you’re not supposed to fall in… he couldn’t say the word… fall in _like_ with someone who isn’t your soulmate (i mean, you can, but it’s kind of frowned upon in society. honestly who the fuck cares, but for story related purposes, you really shouldn’t.) and 2. chenle was his best friend. he’s not ready to ruin years worth of friendship over something as stupid as a possible _crush_. 

3.chenle has his own soulmate to worry about. as soon as he finds them, they’ll fall in love and live happily ever after like all the fairy tales said they would.

_whatever_ , jisung thought to himself. _this probably isn’t even a crush. it’s probably just that time every month or two when i say that i want to be a relationship just so i can have attention and be held and do romantic stuff even though i’m not ready for heartbreak and commitment just yet. i’m fine._

by the time he and chenle worked on the next soul bond, he was so not fine.

“concentrate. empty your head of thoughts. clear your mind.”

at that moment, jisung was lying on his bedroom floor, eyes shut and movements still. chenle was sitting right next to him, his voice lowered to a calm and soothing tone; not as quiet as when he whispered in the library but just enough so that it still felt like anything he was saying was only meant for both of them to hear.

no, no, _no_ , he will _not_ psychoanalyze chenle’s voice today. he won’t succumb to his feelings that easily, if he even had feelings at all for that matter. he was still 50% sure that they weren’t even real and that he was just lonely. it’s the same thing that happened with his first girlfriend; his feelings weren’t feelings after all, they only lasted a couple of days, and he realized that he only liked boys soon after that.

“jisung-ah!” jisung’s eyes widened as he came back down into reality. “what’s with you recently? you’ve been spacing out a lot more than usual.” it’s not that chenle sounded angry, but he seemed to be concerned.

“chenle, i don’t think i can hear anyone else in my head. i think i would’ve known by now if there was.” jisung said as he grabbed his phone from his jacket pocket. “but i do know that you wanna spend more time on this one. so we can just call up mark-hyung and donghyuck?” 

chenle looked at his phone, looked back at him, and gave him a sweet smile that sent his head spinning. “maybe your big head’s good for something after all.”

mark and donghyuck were the first ones in their friend group to get their soulmates because they _were_ each other’s soulmate. during the call, mark described it as a living hell having to hear showtunes and 80s pop music in his head on repeat. donghyuck wasn’t too pleased about it either, since the two spent their entire childhood arguing in each other’s heads, but once they crossed each other's paths for the first time, everything seemed to get better.

“our soul bond ended as soon as we first saw each other, which _thank god_ because as much as i love hyuckie, i don’t think i can handle hearing his thoughts again,” mark explained through speaker. the boys are pretty sure they could hear an annoyed donghyuck in the back go “ _well at least_ you _could control whenever you heard me,_ i _couldn’t!_ ” somewhere in the back. 

“why do you wanna know all that, anyway? you guys were there for the most part,” mark asked the two boys. 

“oh, we’re trying to find jisung’s soulmate and figure out which soul bond he has!”

the line went silent for a moment before they could faintly hear donghyuck yell “holy fuck the bet’s back on?” followed by the sound of something him and him laughing. mark probably threw a pillow at him or something. 

“ignore him,” you could tell through mark’s voice that he was smiling. “i hope that goes well for you guys.” 

as they both said their okay’s and thank you’s, jisung couldn’t help but think that it wasn’t going to go well at all.

  
  


3 - **touch**

  
  


chenle thought it would be a great idea for them to continue the trend of asking their other friends for help on soul bonds and their soulmate experiences. which is exactly why they were here, at jaemin’s apartment with renjun and jeno, having a big sleepover to try and help jisung with the third soul bond on the list: touch.

“you remember how i met them, right?” jaemin said as he opened a brand new pack of pens. “it happened only a year ago? year and a half ago?”

“it’s been a year, jaemin,” jeno smiled as he kept doodling on jisung’s arm with a crayola marker. “but it took us a few months to actually find each other.”

renjun came into the room with his microns at that exact moment to join in on the topic at hand. “hey, i tried writing down my number so you guys would see it but _nooo_ , jaemin wanted us to meet by _fate_ .” jaemin set down his pens and pouted up at his boyfriend. “ _renjunie_ ~, how we met was cute and you know it.”

“wait,” jisung said while he tried his best to not move, “how did you guys meet, anyway?”

jaemin turned to the younger in shock. “ _really_? i never told you??”

“no, you just texted me saying ‘haha loser guess who just got two boyfriends’ and you never elaborated on that.”

renjun sighed, somehow not surprised in the slightest. “alright, sit down, because this is going to take a while,” he said, even though jisung was already sitting down.

apparently, renjun and jeno were friends ever since childhood, so they knew they were each other’s soulmate for years. they were also shocked to find out that another kid’s writing was appearing on their arms, since having more than one soulmate was extremely uncommon. because of this, the two of them agreed to not do anything about them being soulmates until they found their other one.

renjun tried everything to try and find out how to find this person, or _jaemin_ , since that’s what he wrote down when they asked. jaemin wanted them to meet naturally instead of trying to rush things. jeno was fine with that while it left renjun bitter, but still understanding.

it wasn’t until their last year of high school when they met. renjun and jeno went to get coffee one day and saw a new barista behind the counter with a nametag engraved “jaemin.” he couldn’t remember how to make their drinks so he had to write the ingredients down on his hand, which also appeared on both of the customers’ hands, and the rest was history.

“renjun was mad at you, wasn’t he?” chenle questioned with a smile.

“oh, you could see the smoke coming out of his ears,” jeno chuckled. “he still kissed him on sight, though.”

“maybe so,” renjun sighed as he kissed jeno’s and jaemin’s cheeks, only for chenle and jisung to fake gag behind their backs immediately after.

“keep quiet, you two. do you want our help or not?”

“renjun, this wasn’t even my idea in the first place.”

and that was true. jisung was only doing all of this because… wait, why _was_ he doing all of this? to find his soul bond? of course he still worried about finding a soulmate, but he’s never gone out of his way to find them before. he just kind of let his life happen as it went on. 

but then again, there was chenle. this entire thing they were doing was all _his_ idea. the book, the attempts to find his soulmate and soul bond– it was all chenle’s idea. and the funny thing was that chenle was exactly like him; letting life do what it did best and flow without a care. that is if chenle really did care or not that he had a soulmate. for the past 13 years the boys have know each other, the topic of soulmates didn’t get brought up often. none of them were colorblind, none of them had ink on their arms, none of them heard their soulmates in their head, none of them felt their soulmates emotions out of nowhere, and none of them had a sentence appear on their skin yet.

did chenle even care if he had a soulmate or not? or was he as worried as jisung secretly was?

what if jisung didn’t even _have_ a soulmate?

that was a rare possibility, to not have a soulmate. the book said that 95% of the human population had a soul bond and a soulmate. what if he was part of that 5% that didn’t?

jisung snapped back into reality when he felt a marker run across his face.

“keep still, damnit,” jeno said while still drawing on his cheek.

“you good, jisung? you kind of blanked out on us there,” renjun was doodling little stars on his hands. “i know you zone out a lot, but chenle told us you were doing it more frequently.”

at this point, jeno had moved from his face to his other arm, so jisung turned his head to find chenle, who still looked worried for him. how the hell was he even supposed to answer that question? _‘yeah, i keep getting lost in my thoughts because i don’t know if i have feelings for my best friend or not and i don’t want to ruin what we have because of it! also! i might not even have a soulmate, so i’m going to be alone forever!_ ’

“i uhh… i don’t know, i’m just tired.”

“lame,” renjun replied as he drew saturn on his bicep. “i’m kidding, you should probably get some rest soon. we all should.”

jaemin looked around his bedroom, which was probably too small to fit all five of them. “renjun, jeno, and i’ll take the living room while chenle and jisung, you two can take my bed.”

so at around 1 in the morning, with marker ink and pen doodles decorating his arms and face, jisung went to bed. 

yet he couldn’t sleep much that night.

because he might have forgotten that chenle is clingy when he sleeps.

while chenle’s arms were wrapped tightly around his waist, jisung’s eyes were blown wide in the pitch dark bedroom as he tried to calm his racing heartbeat. his usually overthinking mind was turned to tv static, going into overdrive yet doing absolutely nothing at all at the same time.

for what seemed like hours, that’s all jisung did– laid there in gay panic™ while chenle slept right behind him unbothered. this was totally how he wanted to spend his friday night.

that was sarcasm. he was fucking suffering. 

eventually jisung’s body did grow tired and he had to give into sleep at some point. he shut his eyes and drifted off. 

he woke up the next morning still in jaemin’s bed, chenle in his arms, and no mark left from his soulmate.

  
  


4 - **feel**

it was after school one day when chenle decided to see if jisung had the fourth soul bond on the list. they both decided to go to jisung’s apartment because 1. chenle demanded they need “complete and total peace for concentration” and 2. jisung left his wallet at home and couldn’t go anywhere else without it.

like always, fate had different plans.

“johnny-hyung?”

the tall man in the kitchen with slightly messy blonde hair and a “kiss the chef” apron looked through the doorway at the two boys. “yeah?”

“why are you in my apartment?”

“what, can’t i just come over and make my boyfriend and his brother some food?” johnny said in a sarcastic yet playful tone. the timer on the stove went off as johnny rushed towards it, cursing under his breath.

“well there goes our concentration,” chenle muttered to the younger as he pretty much fell and sank into the couch. 

jisung looked at johnny through the kitchen doorway and muttered back “i think i have an idea” before sitting down next to him.

as though he had heard what was going on, johnny hung up his (technically taeyong’s) apron and came out of the kitchen. “so what thing do you two have going on today?”

“hey, johnny-hyung?” jisung asked a bit hesitantly, because he may have known johnny for around two years now, but something about the man still intimidated him. “what exactly was your and taeyong’s soul bond?”

johnny looked at him in surprise. “did he never tell you about it?”

“well, he did, but-”

“we’re trying to figure out jisung’s soul bond.” chenle interrupted, causing the younger to try and quickly cover the other’s mouth. 

“oh, are you guys also going through some of the soulmate textbooks? i got a roommate who’s also doing that but his soulmate’s obviously the guy in his psych class,” the taller man said as he sat down in one of the chairs next to them.

chenle perked up at that. “yeah! he doesn’t have the sight one, the thought one, or the touch one. we were gonna see if he had the emotional one today.” 

“oh, you would know if you had that one. that’s the one taeyong and i had.”

“and what was it like having that one?” you could tell chenle was much more interested than jisung was, but as long as he was happy, jisung would be glad to listen to the story, even though he was around to experience most of it.

“well, it was… interesting. you’d feel like this wave of emotion just smothering you for no reason at any point of any day. i found out i had it when i was a kid. i was grocery shopping with my mom when i was like, 6, and i just started crying out of nowhere. i didn’t know why i was crying, but i also didn’t know why i was feeling really happy that day. like, overwhelmingly happy. but i also couldn’t stop crying and my mom thought something was wrong with me.”

jisung might’ve known what could’ve caused that. he recalled his mom telling him how taeyong acted the day he was born; crying with joy like it was the happiest day of his life.

“it didn’t happen often, but every few months or so i’d feel overwhelmingly sad or happy or even angry for almost no reason. i felt like i was going crazy until i found out it was a soul bond.”

“and how did you know taeyong-hyung was your soulmate?” chenle asked.

“well… i’ve read that it’s like this with everyone, but when you first meet your soulmate, you feel like coming home. you feel this rush of happiness and all of your worries just vanish. you’ll definitely know when it happens.”

jisung looked over at the boy next to him and, _fuck_.

chenle looked so interested in the story and the information given to him, like he was noting everything and taking it to heart. his eyes had a spark to them that jisung had only seen on occasion, but they were also glossy, like he was about to cry. it’s like you could tell that that was what he was paying the most attention to, what he _wanted_. 

it was that one little moment there. it was just a little moment of chenle just focusing on what johnny had to say. that was the moment the bottled up feelings jisung had been holding in for so long finally overflowed.

it’s like every feeling, every emotion came flooding back all at once. how he felt whenever chenle laughed, smiled, joked around, but also when he was vulnerable. jisung wanted to wrap him up in his arms and never let go. 

he liked chenle. there was no denying it now.

he was so fucked.

jisung heard the sound of the door unlocking and turned his head towards the source of the noise.

“hey, jisungie. hey, chenle.” the newly arrived and tired taeyong paused. “johnny, why are you in my apartment?”

“hello, taeyong, love of my life, i missed you too.”

5 - **speak**

  
  


“so,” chenle started, looking at the list of soul bonds in the book. since they were at chenle’s house, he decided to use his old copy of it. “this is the last one.”

“the one that just so happened to be the hardest one to find.”

it had been a few days since they had spoken to johnny about how soulmates were supposed to feel around each other. every word of that conversation had stuck in jisung’s mind ever since it happened. 

and honestly, jisung was so sick of this. he was doing this for what? for his heart to get broken because the boy he does have feelings for isn’t his soulmate? for him to meet his soulmate only to not feel the things johnny said he would?

for him to not even have a soulmate at all?

chenle could tell he was spacing out again, so he gently placed a hand on his shoulder to bring him back down to earth.

“hey, it’s going to be ok. we’ll find them, i’m sure of it.”

“chenle, we’re _not_ sure of it. we’re playing into fate’s hands and we don’t know for sure what soul bond i have or if i even have one at all.”

“don’t say that. i promise you, you’ll find your soul bond and you’ll find your soulmate and you’ll be _happy-_ ”

“but i’m not happy!” jisung snapped as he quickly turned to face the older. “this...thing! this stupid fucking system has never made me happy, not even once! for years, it’s caused me nothing but anxiety for what might happen in the future. i’m so sick and _tired_ of waiting only for something to go wrong or for something to not even ever happen,” he yelled, his vision becoming blurry with tears and his eyes refusing to leave the floor. he couldn’t bear to look up at chenle right now.

“don’t you think that maybe because i don’t have a soul bond, fate just doesn’t want me to have one? or that my soulmate just doesn’t care about me? or if they’re even still alive? or even if i have one at all-“

“jisung, _i’m_ the one who doesn’t have a soulmate.”

whatever jisung was about to say immediately died in his mouth, his eyes blown wide with shock. he slowly looked up to meet his friend’s gaze and _oh_.

chenle looks devastated, tears running down his face and face flushed red. jisung could feel his heart shatter into pieces at the sight.

“...what?”

“i never got my soul bond either. both my parents and pretty much everyone who came before them had soul bond that were common. when i was a kid, when they found out i didn’t have one, they might as well have told me that i should give up on ever looking for one,” chenle stopped to wipe the tears from his eyes that refused to stop falling. 

“i never wanted you or the others to know. i lost hope long ago, but i didn’t want the same thing to happen to you. jisung-ah,” he sniffed to try and keep his nose from running, “you deserve someone who will make you happy and who’ll make you feel loved. i wanted to help you find them before you lost hope. i didn’t want to see what happened to me happen to you too.”

at this point, jisung was trying so hard to keep his tears from spilling that he wasn’t paying attention to what he was saying. “chenle, i seriously don’t think i have a soulmate. i don’t think i even want one anymore.”

“you actually have someone out there who’s spent their entire life looking for you, why would you-“

“i don’t want a soulmate anymore because _all i want is y-_ “

jisung quickly covered his mouth before he could finish. he could feel his heart hammering in his chest, his legs and arms were shaking. he couldn’t breathe. his mind was going into overdrive. he couldn’t think. all he could do was stare at the floor and see the tears fall from his eyes onto the carpet.

the room went deafeningly quiet. none of them dared to speak.

he couldn’t handle this. he wasn’t ready to talk about this. not now. not ever.

jisung stumbled to grab his backpack, muttered an _i’m so sorry_ , and bolted out the door.

  
  


+1 - **fate**

  
  


the two didn’t speak to each other for the rest of the day or the day after that. that day, jisung ran all the way to his apartment and once he got in, he cried until his lungs burned. 

now, he just felt empty. he no longer felt sad or angry at himself for slipping up like that, he just wanted to talk to chenle again. he wanted to tell him everything he’s been thinking for the past few weeks. his thoughts, his worries, his feelings, everything. as much as he didn’t want their friendship to be tarnished for good, he didn’t think he could hold everything in anymore.

he sat up from his bed, reached for his phone, and looked for the contact name in his phone named “zhong,” courtesy of chenle himself. he felt himself stare at the call button for what felt like an hour until he let out a breathe he didn’t even know he was holding in and hit the button.

the phone didn’t ring for long before he heard a strained voice on the other line.

“jisung?”

“chenle, i have to tell you something,” he tried to stay calm despite his heart racing and his hands shaking. “please, don’t say anything. just listen.”

“i…” he took in a deep breath to steady himself, “i was so worried about my soulmate and soul bonds and they system for as long as i can remember. i convinced myself that fate just… didn’t want me to have one, or that it just had it out for me. but now, i’m certain that i don’t even want a soulmate anymore because all the emotions that you’re supposed to feel for your soulmate? i feel for you. i like you, chenle,” jisung’s voice broke, wobbling as he felt tears prickle at the corners of his eyes, “hell, i think…” he steadied his breathing again before continuing.

“i think i’m in love with you. i think i’ve felt like this for a while now. and when you told me you gave up on looking for yours all i wanted to do was hold you. you deserve to be loved and you deserve to have a lucky person more than anyone.” 

after that, it stayed quiet for so long that jisung started to panic and wonder if he said anything wrong. he heard a faint “oh my god” from the other line. he was about to ask what was wrong until he noticed it.

it started as a faint brush of the wind, but now it definitely felt like something was tied around his ring finger, like a thin wire. it began tightening to the point of jisung hissing from the pain. then all at once, a burst of warm light surrounded him, illuminating the small space around him until it all came together to become a physical form. it was narrow, it was bright, and it was red. before jisung could decipher what it was, the light shot out from the room, out from the window and into the city, leading to another building.

and that’s when he remembered an excerpt from the book.

{ “ _… of course there are many uncommon soul bonds in the world, some that even experts have yet to discover. one of the most rare soul bonds to have ever been recorded is the red string of fate, which is said to appear only after a confession of feelings from one soulmate to another._

_those who have had the red string of fate are said to have a connection like any other; a love that can be unbroken …_ “ (Hwang, Moon, et al. _Soulmates: How to Find Them_. National Soul Bond Association of Seoul, 1991.) }

jisung stared at his hand in awe. he couldn’t wrap his mind around it. _this had to be a dream. this had to be some sort of joke-_

before he could finish that thought, he felt a tug at his heart, which was still pounding with adrenaline. he felt something in his mind and in his heart tell him that he had to follow wherever the string lead; that he had to go and that he had to go _now_.

he rushed out of the room before he had to think it over, grabbing his jacket and a pair of shoes on the way out. while rushing to the front door, he was stopped by taeyong who was watching a movie in the living room with johnny.

“jisungie, it’s almost midnight, why are you up so- oh.” he caught notice of the glowing string tied around his brother’s finger that was leading him out the door. jisung stared at him like a deer in headlights before taeyong murmured a “holy shit” under his breath.

johnny broke the silence when he noticed too. “what are you standing around for, sungie?” his voiced boomed in the tiny apartment, “go get them!” jisung smiled at them, something he thought he hadn’t done in a while, and rushed out the front door into the city.

because it was the middle of the night, the streets were pretty much empty except for him and the string tugging at him to follow along. it lead him through intersections, different blocks, different alleyways, and all the while jisung never questioned where he was supposed to go; it’s like his heart knew exactly where it was taking him.

he ended up on an empty sidewalk corner under the streetlights in the middle of the city when he knew when to stop. he wondered why before he looked a few meters ahead and felt all the air leave his lungs.

right in front of him was chenle, also in his pajamas, and also with a glowing red thread tied around his finger.

the same red thread that was connected to jisung’s.

it felt as if a wave of pure love and adoration had crashed down over him all at once. his heart flipped and his blood rushed as every fiber of his being screamed at him that “ _it’s him. he’s the one._ ”

chenle looked at him with wide eyes before slowly forming that sweet smile of his. he slowly walked over to jisung, staring into his mocha eyes before the two crashed into each other, holding each other in their arms as they let themselves lower onto the pavement.

“i should’ve known,” chenle’s said, voice watery and muffled by jisung’s shirt. “i really should’ve known that it would be you.”

jisung huffed out a laugh as he felt his eyes sting for the second time that night. “why am i even surprised?”

they didn’t say another word. they just let themselves hold each other as if they were scared to let each other go.

“i’m so sorry for yelling at you yesterday,” jisung whispered, his voice breaking. “and i’m so sorry for what you went through all this time. i had no idea.”

“hey, jisung-ah, look at me.”

jisung raised his head from the crook of chenle’s neck as he quickly felt hands let go on him, grab his face, and directed his gaze to the older.

“you don’t have to worry about what happened yesterday. you were understandably upset. we both were. you let whatever scared you about the system boil over from being held in for so long. and honestly? i don’t think i could’ve waited another day to tell you either.” he still had that smile on his face, looking at jisung with the most gentle and loving expression.

“i loved you so much. i still do. all i wanted to do was help you to be happy, and if that meant seeing you be with someone else, then i would’ve been satisfied.”

jisung raised an eyebrow and smiled, “how dare you mention me being with someone else while we were literally just crying and hugging each other.”

“how dare _you_ confess through a fucking _phone call_ , you asshole,” chenle said as he playfully hit jisung’s arm and started laughing, “like, who even does that?”

jisung looked at him like he had hung the moon from the sky. he was so in love with this boy and he wasn’t going to bottle it up any longer.

“hey, chenle. do you remember when you said that i deserved someone who would make me feel happy?”

chenle removed his hand from jisung’s face to cover his own, as if he knew where this was going. “jisung, oh my god.”

he felt a grin tug at his lips, “well you make me the happiest person on earth and i, for one, can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”

“park jisung, you are so full of _cheese_!” chenle giggled as he grabbed his shirt to tug him closer. “i knew you liked to read those awful romantic teen books but i never expected them to make you this much into a sap.”

“oooh, you wanna kiss me so bad~” jisung sang in a playful tone, going back to the playful banter the two were used to.

“maybe shut your mouth and i’ll consider doing so.”

“nah, guess you’ll have to shut me up then.”

chenle barked out a laughed, “alright, park, it’s not like i’ve been wanting to do just that for months.”

jisung leaned down to meet chenle in a sweet, passionate kiss, and it felt like coming home.

  
  


-

  
  


turns out the “bet” donghyuck had mentioned on that phone call was about whether the two of them were soulmates or not. they figured that out when they met up with their friends one morning and they both walked into the cafe jaemin worked at with matching red lines circling around their ring fingers, an aftermath of their soul bond, and half of the group screamed while the other half groaned in despair.

“i’m so happy for you guys, i really am, but i don’t wanna give donghyuck and jaemin _fifty fucking dollars._ ”

“suck it, jeno, i am thriving and living my best life.”

“the 1 in 7 billion chance of it actually happening and yet i still won! and renjun didn’t have faith in me.”

“it’s not that i didn’t have faith in you _or_ them, it’s that there was a 1! in! 7! billion! fucking! chance!”

mark turned to the two boys, looking both ecstatic and tired from the commotion happening in front of them. “ignore them. we really couldn’t be happier for you both.”

jisung gave him a genuine smile as he tightened the grip he had on chenle’s hand.

for once in his life, he couldn’t wait for what fate had in store for them.

**Author's Note:**

> hey ! if you read this, thank you ! hope you liked it :)
> 
> dunno if i’m gonna write more fics like this tho. whom knows,,


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